Why “The Organic Dominant”?
This is kind of an expression of a personal path in dominance. After years of trying to figure things out I have come to realize there was really never anything to figure out. It was me. That was what I was trying to find.
Like most I started in BDSM looking for those things that I felt keyed in on my dominance. For some this is rules and structure. For some this is flashy play or a harem. For some it is a specific way of being. For some it is a wild explosion of sexuality involving anyone and everyone they come in contact with.
I tried to focus on what I felt made me dominant. I thought of things such as Lord Byron. . .that gothic image of passion and romance. Ya. . .didn’t work well and I look damn stupid in a puffy shirt and riding boots just for the record.
I thought of the structured rules and formal rituals. That didn’t work out for me either and I tended to find it rather cumbersome. I felt like sub paragraph A, section 4, defines climax as. . . was always part of my play.
I tried wild, animalistic, passionate. . . they worked but not as a mode of being.
So, I contemplated for years, what kind of dominant am I? I thought about this for a lot of years. I mean a lot. Maybe I am dense or something but I kept mulling it over and rethinking it over and over again. What would define me? My art? My passion? My play style? Do I need more toys? Do I need flashier toys? What will fulfill that need in me?
Then I gave up. I just said fuck it. I stopped trying to find it and then it found me. I was looking all that time for what it would be when in fact I should have just been looking in the mirror and seeing what I am. My dominance does not come from anything external . . . it comes from accepting who I am, what I can do, what I like doing. By embracing myself, flaws and all, seeing my strengths and weaknesses, I see who I am. I see what I want. I know what I want and what I need and that gives me power.
My style of dominance comes not from an idea I aspire to but from the person I am. Yes, there is growth I want in myself but in accepting whom I am today; I am empowered to make changes I wish to make. By understanding what it is I want compared to what it is I need, I can understand my next step.
My dominance comes not from any idea but who I am or who I should be but in understanding who I am inside. It is homegrown, one of a kind, 100% organic and pesticide free. It is an organic dominance that comes from who I am, not who I think I am. To me, that makes all the difference in the world.